excuses

when i was in college, i was (like all college students) extremely busy. i've heard it said that college life consists of three things, study, socializing, and sleep, and you can only pick 2 of the 3. juggling such a life left me always feeling like i wasn't quite living up to my personal standards and desires. something was always lagging, or missing. like never before, i learned the limitations of time.

in that atmosphere of demands beyond my ability, i found myself making excuses about spending time with God. i'd grown up with God. talking to Him was almost as natural for me as thinking. the way i saw it, i was continually carrying on a divine conversation in my head. perhaps it's just old fashioned and religious to think i need a regular "devotional" time. isn't God more organic than that? do i really need to put Him in my planner? can such structure really even have life... especially when it's just another thing on my too-long list of things to do? or so was my reasoning. and though i still read my Bible and prayed often (especially when i was responsible for leading something or life felt particularly desperate), i did not have a regular, daily time of prayer. (i also used my busyness during those years as an excuse for eliminating sabbath rest from my life.)

after living this lifestyle of excuses for several years, i met my husband mark. he saw things differently. rather than asking whether i had time to pray, he asked whether i could live a life of peace and victory without praying. was i overwhelmed by the stress in my life? was i too often short with others or negative about life? though i didn't want to admit it, the answer was yes. and what about the gifts and fruit of the Spirit? was i consistently manifesting them, even on my hard days? did i consistently take hold of the grace available to me, through faith, to live and act according to the mind of Christ? i had to admit that, though i had a lot of good beliefs about such things, my performance was not brilliant.

mark has modeled for me the tenacity of one who values time with God more than anything. for him it's not a religious duty he needs to fulfill. rather, it's his air, his breathing. he cannot handle life (who can, really?) without a daily encounter with the divine. from him i learned that the Bible really means it when it says "In Your presence is the fullness of joy" and "at Your right hand are pleasures forever more." (See Psalm 16:11.) Through joining mark in his pursuit, i discovered that when you really taste the goodness of God's presence, you cannot ever get enough... and nothing will stand between you and the desire of your heart.

can you live the Christian life without a daily devotional? yes. i did it for several years. and that entire time i was growing in my walk and even leading others. but i was not living victoriously. i was not living with God's perspective and power in my daily moments. i think it's very possible to be a growing Christian without a regular time with God. but i'm not convinced it's possible to live the Kingdom lifestyle (on earth as it is in heaven) without daily, prolonged communion with the King.

i'm no longer in college. but as a mother of two, my life is busier than ever. we are all busy; we all have excuses we can make. but rather than making excuses, let's make choices. none of us is so busy that meeting with God is impossible. and even if we were, we do not have to be slaves to our schedules (or our kids). the sacrifices are not always easy; but the choice is always available. for me, as a mother of young children, the sacrifice i have to make is sleep. for you, it may be something else.

sometimes we fill our lives with many good things and in the process miss the one or two really important things that God has set before us. let's evaluate our schedules and priorities. where are we going? what do our daily decisions say about us, and where will they take us? if the bliss of intimacy with God is on the top of our list, we must find a way, a place, a time (He will help us! and the reward will be so sweet!) to commune with our Lord, to lean into His kindness, everyday.